A song recommendation for today 🚌
I never thought about going out by myself until I moved to Finland — in fact, I remember the first time (probably the only one) I went to the movies by myself. I watched Little Women, in São Paulo, before the pandemic.
After a year, I was in Helsinki, and I remember getting fascinated by a man who entered the Hemingway’s by himself and opened a bottle of wine and a book. I know this kind of thing happens all the time, and it wasn’t the first time a saw a scene like that. But it was the very first time it hooked me somehow.
His solitude hugged me tight and whispered everything would be ok in my ear. In my foremost winter in Helsinki, I cried because I had no idea how to find people without a job in Finland. My attempt to make friends in the aerial acrobatics class was a letdown. That man lit some light I had forgotten about.
It’s called solitude.
In 2017, I traveled to Cape Town (South Africa) alone and did many things on my own. Made a lot of friends as well, occasionally. In 2019, I went to the Atacama Desert and did the same thing. I knew how to be in solitude everywhere, but not at home — and certainly not in my new home. Being new with no friends came with a heavy weight I created for unknown reasons.
“I need solitude. I need space. I need air. I need the empty fields round me; and my legs pounding along roads; and sleep; and animal existence.”
―Virginia Woolf
Then things got lighter.
The man freed me. I suddenly started going to places with my number excuse to be alone: writing. Since then, I have discovered many places to write, not only coffee shops! Besides, there’s always someone doing the same, and I wonder: are they loners or writers? Maybe both.
I got so confident that I even took myself to a nightclub — so much fun! Last Friday, I went to a concert. Highly recommended if you still don’t have many friends. Concerts are probably the easiest places to go by yourself.
However
Although it’s awesome being independent and doing whatever you want — you can get a little help from the Secret Club to make new friends. Our next event is fully booked, but you can sign up for our waiting list.
Tenho pensado bastante em sair sozinha. Tenho poucos amigos e os poucos que tenho não tô mais na mesma vibe dos ambientes que eles gostam e nem eles nos ambientes que eu gosto. Gostaria que tivesse algo como o clube secreto aqui, ou pelo menos algum outro tipo qualquer de clube como os tradicionais de leitura. Por mais que ficar em casa seja um imenso conforto pra mim, acho que não tem me feito tão bem quanto penso, percebo quando preciso conviver em sociedade. Acho que vou começar a tentar pelas livrarias e praias.